Saturday, February 6, 2010

Breaking Point

"Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts,
don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours."

pic by mary. 2007.

I still think it is extremely unfortunate how people treat other people's trust. They don't take it seriously at all.

Trust is something big for me, nothing to take lightly. I'm actually an extremely forgiving person, but I know my limits. I know when I look foolish. I know when people view me as a walking doormat. So I learn to stand my ground.

The events that have taken place for almost half a year, is really molding/changing how I view people from now on. I think the really nice, purehearted, trusting, green and naive Isabelle has died. Sadly I don't understand why people can't take me seriously. I need to stop being so nice to everyone. I need to be a cold bitch. I should seriously act like Blair Waldorf from now on. I notice whenever I'm TOO nice and trusting of people, I end up hurt and left feeling like I got taken for granted. They feel they can walk all over me because they know (more like assume) I'll forgive them. I should start being mean and intimidating, so no one can dare mess with me and my feelings.
Ironically a lot of people have told me their first impression of me is in fact intimidating and a bit snobby (probably because in general I don't tend to smile a lot, especially around strangers and especially inside a classroom!) BUT when they get to know me I'm the complete opposite. I love proving first impressions wrong. But at the same time I wouldn't mind if people feared me just a tad bit. -__-

But despite what I wrote above, I know I could never just be mean, especially for no apparent reason. I treat people how they want to be treated. Been doing that since I was a kid. But I need to change some aspects of my personality and I will have my guard up whenever I meet new people; whether it be new friends, classmates or potential wooers.

Just a bit pleased that I'm at a point where I feel a bit refreshed and renewed. Where as each day passes by, I'm leaving a lot of my negative thoughts behind me and just looking forward to each new day. I do what I do for me.

I feel like a dove. Specifically the dove featured in Queen's "Save Me" music video. Ok that sounded weird, but I hope I made my point!

As for the the picture above, I've always labeled it as my 'lost' picture. It seemed to match the topic of my post.
But anyways it is from a mini photo shoot that Mel and I did for Mary Anne's suicide awareness ad. Good times!! I should post some pics next time just for laughs and nostalgia purposes.


Mary Anne said...

A lot of people used to tell me I let others walk all over me. Especially my own sister -_-;; And still do sometimes. But of course... after the first ex b/f... *ahem* THAT'S ALL CHANGING!! ... we can be bitches together =D By the way I stilll have to show you your even older photos on my laptop =P

Em said...

Like that stupid jewelry commercial.. keep your heart open and love will always find its way in. I don't think you should become a cold bitch.. but rather more careful of who you let in your life. Pretty much what you're saying though. Izzy couldn't be mean ol' Blair for realsies! haha.

Isabelle Maxime said...

@Mary: Yay for bitches. Can't wait to see all them old pics. Man come over already haha.

@Em: <3 You know me so well heee! But I'll try and be a bit tough. ;)