Once a cheater always a cheater

I am really starting to believe in this saying more and more. Cheating is not just physical, but emotional. And personally I find the latter more painful. Sure they may be physically with you, and he goes home to you and you wake up with him right beside you, but if his mind and heart are wandering off, then he really isn't there. I just find it sad, some guys never really learn. They never grow up and they don't even attempt to change and better themselves. Shame shame shame.

Oh and if you had to use another person to get somewhere in your life, that isn't much of an accomplishment. So stop boasting and claiming all the credit. Cause you wouldn't be where you are without that boost. The NERVE of some people.

State of confusion

Sometimes I wonder what to do with this blog?! Its original purpose is to be the "usual fashion blog" (documenting your daily outfits & posting inspirational pictures, etc) but then I thought, there's so many other blogs doing the exact thing. How can you be original and stand out? I think it's pretty obvious when a blogger is original and when one is trying "too hard". (not trying to bash, but it's sorta true) I just don't want to be perceived as the latter, since fashion has always been a huge part of who I am.


Sadly I wanted to start a fashion related blog (or some form of an outlet) about 3-4 years ago, back when I really DID take a picture of my daily outfit(s). (remember doing so for my ex boyfriend who always wanted to see how I looked like since we didn't go to the same school) Looking back, how I wished I started then, would be nice to see all the change and growth (fashion/personal) any person would experience during a span of 3-4 years. I also wanted to blog about my life, but then I thought what for? My life isn't as exciting as say... Cory Kennedy.

The urge to start blogging again emerged late last year, when I saw in both "Teen Vogue" & "F21" magazine how blogging has become so influential in the world of fashion. It opened my eyes and inspired me all over again. But sadly it's almost been a year since I started my blog and boy... have I sucked at it. Definitely not a consistent blogger at all. Which leads me to: what should I mainly blog about? Should there be a main focus? Or should it be scatter brained? Guess I'm the only person who can answer that. I still want it centered around fashion, just feel the need to add other elements as well. I'll admit it's hard taking daily outfit pics for many reasons: from a busy schedule; to not having a consistent photographer and sadly gaining 10 pounds has discouraged me from even taking pictures. But despite all this, I'll still go for it...because I believe if you really like something, then do it.

Excuse this rant. If you knew me you'd know I tend to just sometimes type whatever comes into mind (and I have to let it out haha). Being the Libra that I am, I tend to sort and balance everything out, but instead of keeping it in my head..might as well just blog it out. I suppose I'm going through a lost or transitional stage, or in deep thought. I am also trying to find ways to improve my blog. Here's to an improved geranium belle by next year. Always stay positive. :)

lag lag lag!

I changed my blog name again. I'm sorry. I'm a Libra and we are known for our indecisiveness.

So from Chic Disposition (fashion related name) to Lust Minus Zero (for the catchy factor) and now geranium belle. It sounds pretty & catchy, you can also visually imagine it (like fashion) and it has a personal pizazz to it, using part of my name.

Last time I'm changing the blog name... I promise! Settling with this name/URL for sure! :D


Anyways!


So I've been MIA again. Blame school school & school. Good news, the spring quarter ends on the 18th. Bad news, I start summer school on the 23rd. -___- Don't wanna promise constant posts or that I'll blog more, but I'll try my best.

I started this blog for fashion related purposes and to document some of my outfits. But I'll try to add variety and talk about whatEVER tickles my fancy, but fashion will always be at the heart of this blog! :) Just wanted to clear that up...

I should start treating this more like my tumblr. Been blogging there more; the re-blog feature still annoys me a tad bit... but overall I enjoy it. Lately I use it as an archive for every interesting/inspiring quote I find. I'm a sucker for quotes and abstract song lyrics.

Summer is coming. Hate hot weather. I want September to come already!

Credit:
Got my header pic from: so much to tell you
One of my favorite blogs! Check it out!

Breaking Point

"Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts,
don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours."

pic by mary. 2007.

I still think it is extremely unfortunate how people treat other people's trust. They don't take it seriously at all.

Trust is something big for me, nothing to take lightly. I'm actually an extremely forgiving person, but I know my limits. I know when I look foolish. I know when people view me as a walking doormat. So I learn to stand my ground.

The events that have taken place for almost half a year, is really molding/changing how I view people from now on. I think the really nice, purehearted, trusting, green and naive Isabelle has died. Sadly I don't understand why people can't take me seriously. I need to stop being so nice to everyone. I need to be a cold bitch. I should seriously act like Blair Waldorf from now on. I notice whenever I'm TOO nice and trusting of people, I end up hurt and left feeling like I got taken for granted. They feel they can walk all over me because they know (more like assume) I'll forgive them. I should start being mean and intimidating, so no one can dare mess with me and my feelings.
Ironically a lot of people have told me their first impression of me is in fact intimidating and a bit snobby (probably because in general I don't tend to smile a lot, especially around strangers and especially inside a classroom!) BUT when they get to know me I'm the complete opposite. I love proving first impressions wrong. But at the same time I wouldn't mind if people feared me just a tad bit. -__-

But despite what I wrote above, I know I could never just be mean, especially for no apparent reason. I treat people how they want to be treated. Been doing that since I was a kid. But I need to change some aspects of my personality and I will have my guard up whenever I meet new people; whether it be new friends, classmates or potential wooers.

Just a bit pleased that I'm at a point where I feel a bit refreshed and renewed. Where as each day passes by, I'm leaving a lot of my negative thoughts behind me and just looking forward to each new day. I do what I do for me.

I feel like a dove. Specifically the dove featured in Queen's "Save Me" music video. Ok that sounded weird, but I hope I made my point!

As for the the picture above, I've always labeled it as my 'lost' picture. It seemed to match the topic of my post.
But anyways it is from a mini photo shoot that Mel and I did for Mary Anne's suicide awareness ad. Good times!! I should post some pics next time just for laughs and nostalgia purposes.